By RYAN TAYLOR

Friends are people you can trust. They will come pick you up when your car breaks down. They are there to pick you up when you are down and there to celebrate when something goes right. Friends are the most valuable thing you have.

Friends do not try to hurt, deceive or manipulate you. (Bernie Madoff is not your friend).

If you bought a house in 2008, most likely your Realtor is not your friend. Almost every single person who bought a house in 2008 now owns an asset that is worth less than what they paid.

Did your Realtor at least tell you that you were making a poor short-term financial decision? Probably not, because he or she is not obligated to do so.

Realtors are not motivated to help make you a good financial decision; they are motivated to create a transaction and earn fees. If President Obama is outraged over Wall Street compensation packages then you should be outraged over Realtor commissions.

And while Wall Street may not have much of a choice about their bonuses for the foreseeable future, there is something you can do as a potential home buyer to protect yourself from making a big mistake when making the biggest purchase of your life.

Ask the right questions and demand the right answers.

Here a few questions you should ask your Realtor and the answers that are adequate and answers that are concerning:

With economic conditions continuing to deteriorate, why do you think this is the right time to buy, as opposed to 6 months from now?

Wrong Answer: Interest rates are at historical lows and sales are up, so we are near the bottom of the market.

Right Answer: Property values are not likely to rise in the next six months and in most cases it is not worth the risk to buy a house now as opposed to six months from now. However, if you have been waiting for this particular house to come on the market for a few months because it is in a well-maintained neighborhood with good schools and an abnormally large lot, it may be a good time to make an offer that fits comfortably within your budget.

What is the value trend over the last three months for properties like the one I am looking at?

Wrong Answer: Sales are up more than 100% year over year. With the increased demand, values are going to be on the rise or are already on the rise.

Right Answer: Allow me to find you 3 comparable sales from the last two months that will show you the current market trend. In addition, I will find you three comparable listings that also give you an indication of what others are asking for. Please realize that listings are very negotiable and so do not necessarily represent the value of the homes they are attached to.

When you are prospecting for homes you want to show me, how do you determine what to show me and what not to show me?

Wrong Answer: I only look for properties that have been listed within the last 30 days. Anything that has been on the market for more than 30 days must have some problem that makes it very undesirable. I also do not look for REOs as they have been neglected and are frequently sold “as-is”.

Right Answer: I apply the criteria you provided me and look at everything that is listed in the school district and city you are interested in. Personally, I like to show some homes that have been listed for a while because I know they are not generating as much interest as some of the new properties. This way we can avoid bidding wars and potentially find a truly motivated seller.

In addition, I enjoy showing REOs because I know banks continue to be strapped for cash and they are willing to negotiate over everything from closing cost incentives to repairs. Finally, I do show short sales but I realize that most end up becoming REO properties, and you as a buyer will most likely get a better deal on a home when it is REO rather than a short sale.

Please provide me with a few closings you are most proud of over the last year that you believe were really good deals for the buyers?

Wrong Answer: I got a great deal for a couple in October where they got a $5,000 closing cost credit. I also helped one of my friends get a home that they bought for $35,000 below list.

Right Answer: There are a few deals I am proud of and I will put together a report for you detailing the price the buyer paid, the closing cost incentives granted by the seller and what their home is worth now. Furthermore, I will have an independent valuation firm run values on these homes so you know you can have an unbiased opinion of value.

If you receive the right answer on your questions, you may just have a friend in the real estate business.

By ANDREW JEFFERY

This post first appeared on Minyanville.

Is it a buyer’s market?

Ask most real-estate professionals the above question, and the response will almost certainly be an emphatic “Yes!”

After all, they quickly explain, inventory levels are at all-time highs, sellers are desperate to get out from under their rapidly depreciating homes, and mortgage rates are at historic lows. What more could buyers ask for?

How about not losing their shirts, for starters.

The traditional definition of a buyer’s market is one where supply outstrips demand, pushing down prices: Buyers have the upper hand. As the bull market begins to wane, however, buyers lose their enthusiasm and become concerned about price. The market cools down and buyers shy away, forcing sellers to make concessions and lower prices. This, in turn, creates an environment where buyers can shop around, be picky, and patiently waiting for their dream house to come on the market.

As demand returns, sellers start upping their list prices, refusing to pay for closing costs and holding out for a better offer. Buyers, fearful they might miss out on the next boom, bid up asking prices and ask for fewer concessions. Now that sellers have the upper hand, the market favors sellers as prices move upward. Such is the cyclical nature of real estate.

This story has played out for decades as real estate plodded along, homebuilders like DR Horton (DHI), KB Homes (KBH) and Toll Brothers (TOL) supplied the market with new construction and home prices marched steadily upward, outpacing inflation by the narrowest of margins. A little more than 10 years ago, however, that relationship started to come unglued.

The recent housing bubble turned the prevailing view of real estate on its head. Homes, long viewed as the most stable of all assets, became a speculative tool for even the most unsophisticated investor. The mania, fueled by lax monetary policy and Wall Street alchemy, helped contributed to the financial crisis currently gripping our country. As property values have careened back to earth, real estate assets of all kinds have become toxic.

Nevertheless, the National Association of Realtors (or NAR) and its dedicated minions have tirelessly peddled their lies that ours is a buyer’s market. Let’s take a quick jaunt back in time to some recent headlines and where that traditional assessment of a buyer’s market got us:

Las Vegas: It’s Definitely a Buyer’s Market
USA Today: July 5, 2006
“Real estate looks like one of the biggest gambles in Las Vegas.”

How true. Property values in Vegas have fallen 33% since summer 2006. Not to be outdone by their peers at USA Today, ABC ran this piece just weeks later:

Take Advantage of Real Estate’s Buyer’s Market
ABC News: July 31, 2006

“The National Association of Realtors said that the number of homes for sale has reached new heights, which is good news for buyers. After years of a seller’s market, it’s finally a buyer’s paradise in Phoenix, AZ.”

Anyone who bought in that “buyer’s paradise” in Phoenix has seen their home’s value fall by more than 30%.

The point isn’t to criticize realtors for arguing it’s a buyer’s market: After all, one should expect nothing less from a group whose entire existence is based on convincing buyers it’s a great time to buy – irrespective of the truth. Just ask Gary Keller, whose new book, Shift: How Top Real Estate Agents Tackle Tough Times, advises agents to “find every way possible to overcome the media-driven real-estate malaise.”

The traditional definition of a buyer’s market needs a bit of a makeover. A more sensible definition is a market where buyers have ample opportunity to make good investments. To be sure, a home is more than just an investment; it’s a place to raise one’s family, to grow old, to spend time with loved ones. However, as far too many American families have learned in the past three years, homes can become a debilitating burden if bought at the wrong price.

In today’s market, there certainly exist attractive investment opportunities. But to label the market as a whole as one where buyers should be rushing out in search of the American Dream is borderline lunacy. Throughout much of the country, home prices are still too high: Real incomes don’t support prevailing property values, even after the historic declines we’ve already seen. Supply, despite remaining at record levels, is likely to remain so for the foreseeable future. Home prices are undergoing a much-needed correction, and will continue to do so until fundamental demand catches up with supply.

This isn’t to say every home on the market is overpriced, or that every buyer in the past 36 months has gotten a raw deal. There are deals to be had if one knows where and how to look – and, most importantly if the purchase makes good financial sense. To borrow a theme from Toddo, “financial staying power” should be at the forefront of any prospective buyer’s mind.

So ignore the hype, both good and bad. As often is the case, not until the most ardent bulls turn in their horns will the bears return to hibernation. So, as soon as realtors concede it may not be a buyer’s market after all, voila! A bottom we will have.